Illegal Pear Throwing
by SamuraiPixie16
Summary: It's high time Kenshin gets his feelings out, and so that's why I'm here. But what does that have to do with illegal pears? And why is the Fbi there? Will Kenshin ever get out his feelings?


Illegal Pear Throwing

Starring: the Rurouni Kenshin characters

Me: (turns to specialized group of couple makers) Alright men operation: *Get Kenshin and Kaoru together* is in progress!

Kenshin: Oro!!! What was that Casey-dono?

Me: (Quickly stuffs the specialized team into the closet, then turns to Kenshin with fake sincere smile) Nothing! (Mutters) you're so indecisive.

Kenshin: Oro, Casey-dono this one is sorry, but this one does not believe that this one is indecisive, that he don't.

Me: Curse his super hearing!

Kenshin: Casey-dono this one does not have super…

Me: (going to the next conversation) Whatever, Any ways… I'M SO TIRED OF THIS!!!

Kenshin: (With shocked expression at the sudden outburst) Casey-dono???

Me: (points at Kenshin accusingly) Kenshin, you and Kaoru need to become a thing!

Kenshin: Oro!!! Casey-dono this one does…

Sano: (interrupting the rurouni) Just shut up and listen to her baka.

Kenshin: Oro! Sano where do you come from?

Sano: (snorts) well lets see, Kenshin have you ever heard of the-

Me: Sano, don't. Even. Go. There.

Sano: (shrugs) Isn't my fault if he was never told.

Me: (sighs) whatever can I just continue?

Sano: (grins) Be my guest.

Me: thank you. Now, (turns to Kenshin) Kenshin.

Kenshin: (doing the laundry, not at all following the conversation)

Me: (smacks hand over face) Kenshin stop with the laundry!

Kenshin: Why Casey-dono?

Me: Because… Because, um…

Sano: real men don't do the laundry.

Me: thanks Sano, your right. Now stop doing the laundry Kenshin.

Kenshin: What's wrong with it? (completely oblivious)

Me: (groans) never mind I don't have that kind of time. Anyway, Kenshin you need to listen very carefully! This is about your crush on Kaoru.

Kenshin: ORO!!!!

Me: (Grits teeth to get rid of frustration) Kenshin Himura don't you dare 'oro' me! You know you LOVE Kaoru, and quite frankly she's actually smitten with you. So you guys need to get together already! I mean for heaven sakes even Jin-e saw that!!!!! (Turns to Sano for agreement) Right Sa…

Sano: (toppled over laughing on the floor)

Me: Sano.

Sano: (laughing his head off)

Me: Sano! (Starting to get annoyed)

Sano: (still laughing)

Me: (eye starts to twitch) SANOSUKE!!!!!!!!!

Sano: (calmed down enough to talk) OMG you're so funny!

Me: (hands on hips) and how exactly is that?

Sano: (taking a deep breath to calm him self farther) I mean really, who uses "smitten" anymore! (Bursts out in another laughing fit)

Me: (pinches bridge of nose) Baka (sighs) guess Megumi hasn't trained him yet.

Sano: (still laughing completely oblivious to the insult)

Me: (becoming annoyed again) Sanosuke, if you don't shut up right now, I'm going to be forced to get Megumi to shut you up for me.

Sano: (immediately stops laughing) Shutting up.

Me: Good, now (looks at Sano with a serious expression) we need to figure out how we're going to get the two hard heads together (peaks over at Kenshin who is doing laundry again and thinks) "God why do I even try?"

Sano: (glances a Kenshin too) Yea, so… (Looks back at me) Do you have a plan?

Me: (smirks) as a matter of fact… I don't…

Sano: Well then, you better get to thinking of one.

Me: Yea- Hey wait a minute, what do you mean 'you'?

Sano: 'You', meaning your self, the-

Me: (Cuts him off) I know what 'you' means baka!

Sano: Hey don't call me the baka! You're the one that doesn't know what 'you' means!

Me: Well then smarty pants, why don't you tell me what it means when I have a legal fruit with me and you happen to be on my bad side (pulls out a pear)

Sano: (backing away) It… um… Oh crap!

Me: (throws pear at Sano's head, knocking him unconscious)

Kenshin: Oro!!! Casey-dono this one believes that you have knocked the baka into a coma, that he does (pokes Sano's head with a stick)

Me: Ah… Um… No he's alright, I think… (Sweat drops)

FBI Agent: I work for the FBI and I'm here upon reports of someone throwing illegal fruits.

Me: Oh yea… (Very skeptical) How do I know you're the real deal pal?

FBI Agent: (pulls out badge and smirks)

Me: (Clenches teeth) cocky-

FBI Agent: what was that?

Me: (smiles innocently) nothing that is any of your business.

Kenshin: (Pulls me to the side) Casey-dono this one thinks that you might want to not talk back.

Me: (Glares at red head) And who are you, my mother?

Kenshin: No Casey-dono, this one is just saying that the nice 'Governmental' agent has the power to put you in jail.

Me: Ooooohhhhh. That's right, hehe. Thanks Kenshin you saved me there.

Kenshin: (slightly smiling) You don't have to thank this one, but if you wanted to anyway you could not proceed with your new operation.

Me: (stares at Kenshin in shock) Whoa, Kenshin I didn't know that you could say something like that. o.0

Kenshin: (Looks completely angelic) It was only a suggestion. ^_^x

Me: Okay what ever, I'm going to go talk to the 'Governmental' dude that's a cocky-

Kenshin: Casey-dono remember kept it at a PG rating. We have children reading.

Me: (Looks at audience) I'm sorry children of the audience please excuse that slip up (goes to corner to grow mushrooms)

* * *

Megumi: And we'll be back after this commercial break, or when ever Casey comes out of her depression.

Advertiser: And now you can buy these unique straws in FOUR different colors! That's right not one, not two, but four!

Me: Megumi! Make him shut up! No one cares about his bendy straws!

Advertiser: Hey kid your interrupting-

Me: (hits button to cancel his advertisement) Oops (shrugs) Oh well, hit it Megumi!

Megumi: (shakes head) You certainly came out of that fast enough.

Me: Yea well any one would with that kind of comical replacing them.

Megumi: Whatever. And were back in five, four, three, two, one…

* * *

Me: (Leaning over the Agent dude's shoulder) um…

FBI Agent: What do you want?

Me (Taking a deep breath to keep from punching the punk) Hehe, might I ask what kind of fruits are considered illegal?

FBI Agent: Cherries and pears are the only two illegal fruits.

Me: Oh really now, that's very interesting (sweat drops)

FBI Agent: (goes to observe the pear for evidence)

Me: (glances at Kenshin) psst… Did you call the FBI?

Kenshin: (Shakes head) No this one didn't.

Me: Than who… (Catches sight of Saito) Saito did it… (growls amazingly perfectly, sounding almost real)

Kenshin: Casey-dono this one wonders how you learned to make your growl sound so real.

Me: (smiles brightly completely forgetting about Saito) I learned a trick or two from Inuyasha's brother Sesshomaru (Eyes twinkle) god he's so sexy!

Kenshin: Oro, who is Inuyasha?

Me: (bits lips) Oh, um… never mind, he's in a different anime.

Kenshin: Oro!

Me: (places hand on Kenshin's shoulder) I'll tell you when you are older.

Kenshin: but this one's thir-

Me: (arches eyebrow) How old Kenshin?

Kenshin: Oh um… I uh think I hear Kaoru-dono calling

This one … Yes well this one has to take his leave now (runs away with super ultra samurai speed)

Me: coward.

Sano: (Magically popping out of nowhere) hey.

Me: (screams) Sa-Sano (Breathing hard) I thought you were in a coma.

Sano: Psh, no pansy is going to put me in a coma.

Me: Sano a pansy is a flower; I threw a pear at you.

Sano: What! You mean I was done in by a pear!

Me: yea.

FBI Agent: Ah ha you admit to the illegal act.

Me: Crap I forgot about him.

FBI Agent: (cuffs me) Lets take a drive downtown.

Me: No you can't do this to me!! I'm under contract!!

FBI Agent: Uh huh of course you are

Me: No!!!! I want my lawyer!!!! Megumi!!!

Megumi: (Looks up from Inuyasha manga) I could have swore that someone just yelled my name right now (Shrugs) Oh well (continues to read manga intently) Man this Kikyou Character is so not making my fav's list…

The End


End file.
